Bald Movies – Kong: Skull Island (2017)

Jim and A.Ron have seen the majestic Kong: Skull Island, and are… not underwhelmed. Not overwhelmed, certainly. I’d say we were properly whelmed. This is an expensive, state of the art monster movie, and delivers the goods that you were expecting. Unfortunately, 90% of its best moments are captured perfectly by the movie’s trailer, which is a shame, and maybe we shouldn’t judge it for that, but there it is. We also break down a few trailers for upcoming movies as is our wont, but if you want to hear Kong-sized spoilers about Skull Crawlers and giant Stick Bugs, you’re going to have to be a Club Bald Move member.

Bald Movies – Logan (2017)

Jim and A.Ron are very impressed with the swan song for Hugh Jackman’s Wolverine in Logan.  It’s a great film, nevermind a great comic book movie, drawing on our long history with the tortured Wolverine and Patrick Stewart’s equally iconic Charles Xavier to generate real emotion as these men struggle at the end of their days.…

Bald Movies – Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (1971)

Josh Wilson from North Carolina has commissioned yet another movie! This time he selected the psychedelic and family friendly (?!) 1971 Gene Wilder classic, “Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.” What’s going on with Charlie’s grandparents? Is his grandpa a coke fiend? Do the Umpa Lumpa have free will? Why is chewing gum considered a personal flaw? Why does Charlie get a free pass for stealing fizzy lifting drinks? And what business does Quaker Oats have making movies, anyway? All this and much more are considered.

Bald Movies – Insidious: Chapter 2 (2013)

Sean Ray is back with the second half of his two part Insidious series, this time for Insidious: Chapter 2. Once again James Wan helms another scary story starring Patrick Wilson and Rose Byrne, with a bigger budget, a clever plot that builds on everything from the first installment, to deliver arguably a more frightening experience with even more emotional heart.

Bald Movies – A Cure for Wellness (2017)

A.Ron and Jim saw A Cure for Wellness, the ambitious but ultimately flawed psychological horror film by Gore Verbinski. It’s got a lot of things going for it; a spectacular and committed cast (Mia Goth, Dane DeHaan, Jason Isaacs), great visuals, disturbing imagery galore, yet manages to build very little suspense and ultimately leads up to exactly what you think it will 30 minutes into the film. Ultimately, we can’t recommend this film, although we think it was a worthy film making attempt. After discussing our brief non-spoiler thoughts on the movie, we discuss the trailers we saw before the feature, and then break down the twists of the film, such as they are, in the Club Bald Move exclusive spoiler section.

Bald Movies – John Wick: Chapter 2 (2017)

Jim and A.Ron have seen John Wick: Chapter Two, and proclaim it “more of the same”, and we mean that as a compliment. There’s still some shaky plotting when the action dies down, but thankfully that only happens for five, maybe ten minutes tops and then it’s back to headshots and stabbing galore. This film’s body count is astronomical, and if you can’t find some sort of grim humor in Keanu butchering men and women like so much cattle, then this isn’t the film for you. But you probably already knew that. Also! We discuss trailers for upcoming films, then get super spoilery about Mr. Wick, but that’s an exclusive feature for Club Members Only!

Bald Movies – Terminator 2: Judgement Day (1991)

Congratulations to Nick Wilson, winner of one of two official “Bald Move Fantasy Football Leagues” that our forums play host to. His grand prize was a commissioned podcast, which we are pleased to present during Superbowl week. Nick picked a real crowd pleaser, Terminator 2: Judgment Day. Featuring ground breaking special effects, a sci-fi plot that doesn’t give two craps about causality, and Arnold Schwarzenegger at the height of his powers, the movie delivers the action goods, and then some. We discuss time travel, great movie villains, where this movie stacks up in the pantheon of sequels, and much more.

Bald Movies – Gold (2017)

Jim and A.Ron give their thoughts on a terrible, no good, boring film starring Matthew McConaughey, Bryce Dallas Howard, Édgar Ramírez and directed by Stephen Gaghan; Gold. It’s the definition of a mediocre film that half-asses themes that much better films have done very recently, including The Wolf of Wall Street, American Hustle, and The Big Short. We also discuss the upcoming lineup of first run Bald Movies, before getting to the Club only spoiler section. See you in a few weeks for John Wick 2!